Angels Build Amidst Grief


Having just celebrated a birthday and turning my attention to a new year, I want to deposit a message of hope here on this page. I believe that when God speaks, his message can serve both an individual and the corporate body of Christ simultaneously. It also serves those who don't know him as he makes himself known. Hope is for all mankind! So I have a story to share, which is for me, you, and all of us. And what makes this even more special to me personally is that this story comes from the heart of God through my daughter. ❤️ I asked for her permission to share it to encourage others. She was excited about that, as long as she didn't have to write out the story! She sat with me and shared a dream she experienced, as I transcribed. I was deeply inspired as she recounted her night vision, and I am honored to relay it to you. Pertinent to this story is knowing that my husband - and father of my two kiddos - passed away six months ago. So without further introduction, give you "Libby's Story."


************

It was a scene that reminded me of the story of Sodom and Gomorrah.

My mom, brother, and I had been inside a teetering building that looked like it could fall over with a gust of wind. The building resembled a mix of a hospital, hotel, and school. Two black men in streetwear, who I believe were angels, had led us out of the building. Right outside of the building was a computer that required signing in and out for entry and departure. My mom was making sure to sign us out, or so I thought, even though we were facing imminent danger.

Urgently, I said, "Mom, why are you signing out?! We have to go!" But I then instinctively knew it wasn't us she was signing out, but rather my dad. I saw the computer screen enough to confirm. Then, the building came falling down. 

Immediately, the two angels began dragging rubble from the fallen building and talking amongst themselves, saying something to the effect of, "What should we call this event?" And they talked about calling it the "earthquake of whatever the year was." (And they told me to remember the year, but now I can't remember.)

We followed the two angels as they continued dragging rubble, and we stopped not far away where I saw a foundation had already been put into place for a new structure. Standing on this foundation, I saw the silhouette of a man from behind with light around him, playing a harp and singing praises to God. 

The two angels started building around this man and the foundation. They built so fast! A new wall in two seconds, and then another wall in two seconds. And more and more angels came, about 6 or 7 total, and they effortlessly formed the rubble into enormous cinder blocks, and then used their wings to fly those blocks to where they were needed to build out the structure. It was all happening so fast!

I ended up watching from a spot up on one of the walls, and an angel was standing with me.  One of the angels was working on the left wall, and he came flying up with a huge concrete piece and placed it on the wall in line with the other bricks. 

I saw the scene of the man singing three times in a loop before waking up. 

 ************



Wow. I feel like even typing this, I need a minute. The gravity of God's word in our lives sometimes needs a pause.  

This is a rebirth season. 





Libby said the dream reminded her of Sodom and Gomorrah, and why that resonates is because God said not to look back. I have struggled with the turning to salt thing for a bit now, but I think we could all agree that there is definite symbolism that salt is preserving. (If you don't know the story, you can read it in Genesis 19 of the Bible.) I believe God didn't want what was in the place they were leaving to be preserved in the hearts of Lot and his family. He didn't want them longing for it. Why? I'll actually leave that question here with you to ponder.


Does that mean I am not to cherish the memories of my husband or gain comfort from them? On the contrary! In the dream, I had signed him out with us, not physically of course, but in spirit. It symbolizes a connection between the old and the new - an integration of the two. I believe a new foundation was already being laid before he passed, which he was a part of. We now carry into this season his memory and everything he taught and invested into us - his legacy. And what makes this very special and personal to us is that one of his absolute favorite things to do was worship. This is probably the part that stood out to me the most. There was praise going forth. And this is so important that God showed it to Libby three times! All the activity of building and the building itself centered around that praise! It was the "foundation" of what was taking place. When she told me this part of the dream, I sat in the awe and reverence of that revelation for some time. I was jealous and happy for her at the same time! I wanted to see it too!



I've thought on all of this a lot over the past few days. God's heart is always for hope and a future, never for calamity (Jeremiah 29:11). Grief is good. Grief is necessary. Grief is human. But God also doesn't want us stuck to where we die in the valley. As I recently heard James Goll recite Psalm 23, he quoted David as saying, "I walk through the valley...". (You can find this encouraging video here.) David's words imply movement, even though sometimes we may need to sit (during our journey) or even crawl. I recently spoke to another widow who talked of crawling to the bathroom at home, because her grief was so heavy. One word David for sure didn't use was "run"; I think that's important. I know personally that my grief journey has been a very steady and consistent walk, so David's words track for me. 


So I am thankful for what has been, and I am fully looking to now in this day for what is and what is to come. And our family is surrendered to what that is. And one thing I know is that praise and worship are to be the center of that. This also tracks, as Isaiah 61:3 reveals a divine exchange of a "garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness." We have to put our arms in the sleeves and let it cover us; it's a choice. I know for the first four days after my husband's death, I had no music in my soul. And then on day 4, I had a song come bursting through - one I had started but couldn't finish - and that is what I sang at his celebration of life service. Another thing I know is that I'm not doing the heavy lifting! What a relief!



So in this season, I celebrate. It was the ending no one wanted for the past chapter, but the page is turned to a new chapter. Behold, he is doing a new thing. The rubble is being reformed, reshaped, and effortlessly built into a new structure on a foundation that was already being laid. As you walk through the valley, know that Jesus walks with you. He leads you beside the quiet stream and restores your soul. You don't have to find your way; he will lead you in the dark. He says to us, "I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" (Isaiah 41:10). It's his hand of strength. Here was my quick Google search: "Does the right hand resemble strength in Isaiah 41:10?" The result: ..."...In ancient biblical culture, the right hand represents active power, capability, and protection rather than passive presence. Being held or upheld by it means being sustained by God's total strength when you are too weak to stand on your own." (References for this AI compilation were: The Bible Project, YouTube: Abundant Life Devotional, and TikTok: God Holding Your Right Hand for Strength and Guidance.) I love how Paul writes in the New Testament: "Therefore, I will boast in my weakness" (2 Cor 12:9).  Be encouraged in the new today. Rest while he effortlessly builds (Ps 127:1) and praise while he perfectly plans (Jer 29:11). His banner over you is love (Song of Sol 2:4). 

Blessings,

- Jenny










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